Fuck This & Be Kind

I feel like shit. Uni has screwed me over. That is not entirely true. One assessment – a pass/fail assessment – fucked my unit up and caused me to fail my unit. I so angry. I am going to spend $3000 on one unit to do one assessment all over again because I messed it up. This is such a waste of time. I have shown I can do the unit and get high marks in all other assessments so I can clearly show I understand the learning outcomes. Fuck this. They were so harsh and intimating and horrid. It makes me so angry that people treat people like this. They were not compassionate or understanding or even respectful. I understand people may be like, “Welcome to the real world” but fuck that. Why can’t people be kind? Or just not complete dickheads. If you can ever just be nice, just be fucking nice. I feel uninspired and awful and like nothing and no one should make anyone feel like that. Fuck that. This tiny little thing has made my life feel meaningless which makes no sense. My life is still groovy. This one unit means nothing. And to be fair I worked so hard at this unit and fucked it up and they fucked up and everything is fucked. Fucky McFuck Face. This is me being really angry. I am so bad at being angry. But still. I do not want to repeat the stupid fucking unit. It would be such a waste of time. But whatever, you can’t fight some shit. You can try but you can’t fight everything, or at least you won’t win everything. It is shit but yeah. Sometimes life sucks, like life can fucking suck. But usually not all of life. Just a little bit. And that can make everything feel like shit. Don’t let one bit of existence fuck over the rest. Other things make life okay and bearable whilst one stupid fucking thing fades into the stupid fucking distance. Just keep on going and breathing and shit will get better. Now this is not necessarily my terrible decision or maybe it is but I don’t know, it feels like someone’s terrible decision or just stupid and dumb and awful and fuck and whatever. If you feel like shit, try not to, cause fuck that, fuck someone else or something else making you feel like shit. In my teenage mind, I’d like to say, you rock, they suck and for fuck sake the world needs to get it shit together. Not necessarily around my one stupid unit failure but about everything. Everyone just needs to be kind for just a little bit. Not even polite. Just kind.

Sorry for the language but fuck this. Drink some champagne.

Terrible Decisions & Drinking (not always a terrible decision)

Now, I do not condone drinking. I love drinking. Very, very much. But if I’m honest, it is not always the best decision ever. This is an overly generic list – although, very relatable. Please enjoy.

Beer: 

“I’ll just have a few drinks with the lads (or ladies), no worries, not a big one” 

Next minute it’s 1am and you are a goner. This is assuming you have not played beer pong…if you have you have pre-emptively written off the night – good on you for forward thinking.

 

Wine:

“Should we get a glass or a bottle? Probably a bottle.”

Wine is very sneaky when it gets you. Always assuming it is on your side. No. It will make you an honest foul.

 

Champagne: 

“Yay! Lets celebrate that minor achievement with a bottle of bubbles!” 

Always a lovely choice but after one bottle, it is always another, and then another drink and before you know it, you are waiting for you friend to stop throwing up in the really nice restaurant or bar’s you have chosen to celebrate whatever in. Champagne is French for, as Taylor Swift would say, “a nightmare dress as a day dream” (Okay it might not be but may as well be).

 

Cider:

“Oh, I’ll just have a cider.”

Cider is not a responsible choice? It still has a normal amount of alcohol in it. You’re not fooling anyone.

 

 

Vodka:

“I’m so tired. I’ll have a vodka red bull. $15 really? Okay I’ll get 3.”

Ever so expensive, taste ever so terrible and yet a very efficient choice. Ticks many boxes.

 

Tequila:

“Lets do shots! Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots!”

Do not do shots. I am a great supporter of drinking but do not do shots. Terrible Decision.

 

Rum:

“Oh, this has rum in it? Well, I guess I’m a pirate.”

People often forget about white rums and how often they are used in cocktails. No, this does not make you anything like a pirate. You are nothing like Jack Sparrow.

 

Bourbon:

“I’m manly. I’ll have a bourbon and coke mate. Cheers.”

Drink what you want to drink. Do not drink based on your masculinity (or femininity for that matter).

 

Midori:

“Midori and lemonade please! Yes, I’m over 18! Haha.”

This is what 16 year olds drink when they shouldn’t be drinking. Stop it. Drink a real drink. For fuck sake.

 

Sambuca:

“Last time I drank Sambuca I threw up everywhere! Haha! That was back when I was 19. I’m sure it won’t happen again!”

Yes it will. Do not drink it. Ever. No.

 

Whisky:

“Is this whisky or scotch?”

Very minimal to note. I do not drink whisky often. Whatever.

 

Scotch:

“I only drink the finest scotch’s.”

Yeah, to be fair, you have paid a lot for this scotch, you can be a bit arrogant about it. But I will give you no extra respect because of it.”

 

Be wise in your choices. And have a good time.